Saturday, October 27, 2018

We're Moving On Up!

Not sure if it is the east side and it definitely is not a dee-lux apartment in the sky but we finally bit the bullet and moved! I can’t believe I am even typing those words. It still seems so surreal. Oh, for the record we actually moved one year ago today...I am just getting around to writing about it now.

Here is the back story; about 9 years ago we bought my husband’s grandmother’s home. At the time it was perfect for us however, we outgrew it very quickly. We outgrew it about a year after we moved in. Our plan was to renovate it and move to something bigger. Life happened and kind of got in the way. When we moved in Sara was only 2 and we had 2 small cats so there was plenty of room. We have since added 2 more kids and a big, lazy dog. We were busting at the seams. The girls were all in one room. We made it work; we had a bunk bed for Sara and Anna and there was a trundle on the bottom for Emily. When one of my kiddos told her teacher their baby sister was sleeping in a box I knew we either needed to move ASAP or face the real possibility of DCF coming looking for a toddler in a box.

By some miracle of fate Chuck got on board with my idea to move. It may or may not have had something to do with my declaration that I was moving and the rest of them were welcome to join me, or not, their choice. I think the thought of having to get the house market ready paled in compassion to the thought of having to raise the kids without me. So we called a real estate agent and she said she could come the next day. Now I have wanted to move for years but Holy Sh*t, tomorrow? That was fast! I like to think I keep my house pretty clean but not real estate agent clean! It was the last day of summer vacation and I had plans with the kids, telling them I had to stay home and clean was going to go over like a fart in church. So in between the bouncy pillows and ice cream I was cleaning like a mad woman. I swear that is how I tore my rotator cuff. When we renovated our kitchen we wanted it to be all bright and clean so we went with white cabinets. That whole afternoon I was channeling my inner Julia Roberts every time I would say, "Big mistake, Big. Huge." while scrubbing those damn white cabinets. In my day to day I never noticed how absolutely disgusting they were. I was up around the clock until our appointment with the agent the next day. In all honestly I think I lost 25 pounds of water weight through the sweat that was pouring off of me.

That afternoon she comes to our house and we thought she would give us a list of about 80 things we needed to fix before putting it on the market. In our mind we had a good 6 months worth of work ahead of us. To give a little perspective, our house was not in the best shape; it had good bones as they say but the roof was literally held together with Flex Seal (you know the As Seen on TV stuff). I mean in our defense we did have it in various colors to match the different shades of the roof shingles. We weren't total derelicts for Christ's sake. There may have also been some self leveling concrete filling in some questionable cracks but then again, there may not have been...wink, wink. And while getting the girls closet in order the door may have fallen off the hinges and there may have been super glue involved in fixing it. But that one we should get a pass for since I broke my finger when the door came off the hinges and fell on top of me. Gallons of paint were sacrificed over the years painting over the same water stains in the bedrooms--so you can kind of see why we had months of work cut out for us.


In less than an hour we were signing papers agreeing to put it on the market THAT WEEKEND!! W.T.F. did we just get ourselves into? She would be coming back in a few days to take pictures of the house. So now came the real work; I had to keep the house clean, like really, really clean from now until we sell the house! Ugh, I had a 9, 7 and 4 year old at the time and cleaning is like friggin Kryptonite to them. I think I did more yelling in that 2 weeks than I had in my previous 44 years C.O.M.B.I.N.E.D. I swear I was like a fire breathing dragon. If the kids so much as left a piece of lint behind fire would come out of my mouth and steam was spewing out of my nose and ears.


The house did go on the market just a few days after our initial meeting and had an open house right away with multiple showings. The pictures she took were amazing! Now I'm not saying trick photography was used but when I saw it online I wanted to buy it! I was at work for one of the showings and Chuck was responsible for getting the kids out of the house before it. He calls me and tells me that one of them clogged the toilet and another dumped a bucket of toys out. My first thought is why the hell are you still there, they will be there in less than 20 minutes???!!!


Somehow our real estate agent pulls off the unthinkable and not only sells our house in a week, she gets above asking!! I honestly thought we would have to pay someone to take the house off our hands! After looking at a few houses we find one we really like in the neighborhood we really wanted to be in. We never thought we could make it work but not only does our real estate agent get us the house she gets our first offer accepted, under asking price in 20 minutes!! Most people think of Anne Sullivan when they hear the term "Miracle Worker" but nope, not me, I think of Keri. She was a pit bull. She was determined to sell our house and get us the home of our dreams and she did! From the day she came to meet us until the day we closed was 56 days!! It was a super fast process but it felt like forever when we were going through it!


Moving day came, we were closing on both houses and had everything timed out to the minute and of course our movers show up an hour late. One of them was about 90 pounds soaking wet but man did they move! I couldn't really enjoy the moment because of course I woke up with a migraine and spent the better part of the morning puking and of as luck would have it all the towels and even paper towels were packed away so all I had was the last of the toilet paper roll. But we pulled it off- moved out and in all in the same afternoon!


The neighborhood is a really nice neighborhood. Everyone takes care of their yards, no one has sofas on their front porches, people wave to each other and chat at the bus stop. We move in and bring the white trash factor hard. We were in the house all of 10 minutes when Emily strolls outside in a black t-shirt and diaper. No pants. Come on! For F's sake, we need to at least try to blend in for a few days before we show our true colors.


We needed a ton of furniture for the new house. So we get a brand new dining room table, nothing too fancy...IKEA, told you we were bringing the W.T. effect to the hood, but it was new and nice. It was up not more than 24 hours before the friggin dog jumps up on it. We start yelling, she panics and tries to scramble to get off of it all while digging her nails in to the table top. So now we are forced to always have place-mats out. Now we are not fancy folk by any means but now we always have the appearance of an impending dinner party dah-ling.


Today marks a year since the big move and our life has changed in so many ways. Our old house was on a really busy street with no kids close by. This neighborhood is bursting with kids and more often than not they can all be found at my house. I can never pull in the garage when I get home from work, there are always a crap ton of bikes and scooters clogging our driveway and you know what? I wouldn't have it any other way! The kids have taken over our basement turning it into a school, they have a classroom set up and have taken over my office, which I set up to write the book I have been threatening to write for a few years, and turned it into the school adjustment counselors office. I love that the girls are still playing and not sitting always clinging to technology to keep them busy and I love that the neighborhood kids are in to it too! We have a perfect sledding hill on the side of the house that doubles as an epic slip and slide hill, our poor neighbors did not sign on for the circus that is our house but they are going to have to deal because we are here to stay! In the past 365 days these neighbors have become so much more than that. They have become surrogate parents to my kids and friends; an early morning SOS text the other day and one of them came over to help me out in an emergency no questions asked. I needed someone to grab one of the girls after school for me and it was done without a second thought. If the girls are out playing and they get hurt one of them will swoop in and check they are ok and they know I would do the same for them. As cliche as that sounds there is no price you can put on that.


Oh, if anyone is looking for a real estate agent I know a good one!












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